Ugh, Philosphers

So yesterday, while walking through the street of Athens, I heard the story of a peculiar man trying to corrupt the youth. Socrates, I believe his name was, and he will soon be brought to trial and likely killed for his actions. I was fortunate enough to be able to speak with the man before they did so. And let me tell you how ridiculous this situation is! First off, the reason why he is being prosecuted. They say it’s for corrupting the youth, but really, he is teaching them to think for themselves. Socrates wants the youth of Athens to think outside of the social norms rather than blindly accepting what was taught to them by the elders of society. He referred to this as the "Socratic Method." To be honest that is the real reason why he should be prosecuted. It’s just a bunch of rambling on and talking in circles! He’s not corrupting the youth, just confusing them.
Let me explain to you where Socrates is going wrong. He is looking at the situation from the angle of a philosopher, not a scientist. He wants to sit down and have a back and forth conversation with others, taking everything said at face value. But here is how a scientist would approach the situation. First, you analyze their thoughts, then you make the connections between what they say and what they really mean, and finally, you take everything that they say and over-sexualize it. If the patient doesn't leave enlightened and uncomfortable, then you're not doing it right! But that’s just a thought from the mind of a scientist.